All's Fair in Hate and Pranks
by Zyllion
Summary: What do you get when you match up twin exchange students, and the marauders? You get a major prankfest, revenge, and a hatred of the prank-players! If you want to know exactly who is at the butt end of everything, you should read on...CAREFULLY!
1. Prologue

Rachel sat in a graveyard. She held in single red rose clasped across her chest, and had tears rolling down her cheeks. As she paused to take a breath, she read the inscription, for what had to be the millionth time.

To a mother 

_And a wife_

_Living no more_

_The tears shed_

Only reveal she was loved 

That was all Rachel could handle. Names weren't what was important, nor were dates.

Quiet footsteps were heard from behind her, but Rachel didn't even turn around. Her twin sat down next to her, and put her arm around her shoulder. Together the two of them sat crying in memory of their mother, who had died only the year before.

A faint call in the distance from their father brought them out of the reverie "Girls! Dinner!" As one, the two got up and walked towards the house.

Their father looked at their puffy eyes, and nodded to himself. "You both got a letter from Headmaster Becker." They accepted the proffered letters and began to read.

_Dear Rachel,_

We have been looking at your grades recently, and since are starting an exchange program we are wondering if you would be interested in going to another school for the year.

Rachel looked over at her sister and asked quietly, "Exchange program?"

When Ariana nodded, they both returned to their letters.

The name of the school is Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. If you decide to go, then I will send you more information. I will tell you that you will be sorted once you get there. They have their own method, as you will hopefully get a chance to see.

_Sincerely,_

Joshua Becker 

The twins shared a glance, and in that one instant it seemed that volumes had been spoken. The glance had said that yes, they would go to this Hogwarts School, wherever it might be.

The ate a very quick dinner, then hurried upstairs to write a response to their headmaster.

~*~

Before they knew it, the two were on a muggle airplane, on their way to the Leaky Cauldron. They would stay there until September 1, when they would travel to King's Cross station. They would take the Hogwarts Express with the rest of the students.


	2. Out of the Train, and Around the Campus

Disclaimer: This is for this chapter, and chapter one, as well as for the rest of the story…Any recognizable characters, are JKR's. However, I own all rights to the twins.

~*~

September 1 dawned as an absolutely gorgeous day. Rachel rolled out of her bed in one of the rooms, and made her way downstairs for breakfast. There was no hurry, as her trunk had never really gotten unpacked since she and her sister had gotten there.

"Morning Tom." she yawned.

"What'll you have, Rachel?"

"Whatever ya got. Is Ariana up yet?"

"Yes. I'll get you what she's got. She's in the corner over there." He pointed Ariana out to Rachel, and watched for a minute as she walked over to her sister. Then Tom laughed to himself. "I wonder how long it will take the two of them to realize how powerful they are. Oh well, back to getting them breakfast." He walked back to the kitchen.

"Hey, Sleeping Beauty."

"Excuse me? You're the one who usually sleeps in every morning. So you're one to talk." Both girls laughed, and then Rachel yawned again.

"First day at a new school, and they gotta sort us with that sorting hat thingy-ma-bobber. Nervous?"

"What's there to be nervous about? Even if we don't make any new friends, then we'll still have each other."

"True."

They sat in silence and ate whatever it was that Tom brought them for breakfast, then got ready to go. When they had finally managed to drag their trunks down the stairs they found a ministry car waiting for them. They glanced at each other, and tossed their trunks in the back, and headed over to the station.

Once they were inside the station, Ariana glanced down at her ticket. "Platform 9 ¾. There's platform 9, and there's platform 10." She pointed them out. "Now how did Becker say to get through it?"

"Just walk through the barrier. C'mon." Rachel said, grabbing at her cart, and heading directly for the barrier. When she disappeared, Ariana blinked, then nodded to herself. "I guess Rachel was right." Then she followed, crashing into her sister, who was standing stock-still in front of where the barrier was.

"Rachel. Come on. This is not the best place to stand right now."

"I know. But it's just so different from home."

"We both know that. Let's find a space before the train starts. Race you?"

They grabbed their trunks, and through much dragging, lugging, and laughter, finally managed to get everything onto the train. With that done, they collapsed onto the train and waited for it to start, taking them to Hogwarts.

The train ride itself passed rather uneventfully for the two of them. A couple games of wizard chess, a game or two of exploding snap, the rereading of the letters that Headmaster Becker had given them, skimming through a couple of their textbooks for the year, and of course taking a minute to change into their school robes.

When they stepped onto the platform at Hogwarts, the first thing that they saw was a giant man calling for the firs' years. The girls stuck close together and waited for someone to call them over.

"Ariana! Rachel! Over here!" They turned at the sound of the voice, and saw a woman standing there, looking very strict. When they had walked over, the woman introduced herself. "I am Professor McGonagall, deputy headmistress. If you two will come with me, then we will take care of a small personal sorting ceremony, and then you will join the house that you are sorted into."

Ariana and Rachel did all that they could do; they nodded, then followed Professor McGonagall. McGonagall led them through so many rooms, that they were thoroughly lost, and finally they were in the room with the sorting hat.

"This is the sorting hat." McGonagall nodded in the direction of the sorting hat. "You will put it on one at a time. Ariana, if you would please put it on."

Ariana walked  over to the sorting hat. She picked it up, and placed it gently onto her head. Even though she had read the information that Headmaster Becker had given them, she was still shocked when she began to hear the hat talk in her head.

"Let me see. Definitely the cunning of Slytherin. You would do well there. What's that? Oh, I see. Well then, as loyal as you might be, Hufflepuff is not for you. Books, Ravenclaw. I could put you there, you know. And then there's Gryffindor. The brave ones. And you were where? Ah, I see. I guess that you must belong in **Gryffindor**."

Rachel ran over to Ariana, and hugged her. "You got the one you wanted." she whispered in her ear. "Now I want to know if I get the same; the one that I want."

Rachel walked solemnly towards the sorting hat and put it on her head. Her only reaction when the hat began to speak in her head was to blink. Then she waited patiently for the hat to tell her where she belonged.

"Just like your sister. Hmmm. I really ought to put you into Slytherin. You, of all people, would do well there. Better than your sister, even. I don't think you would do particularly well in either Ravenclaw or Hufflepuff. Being studious and loyal does not necessarily make you perfect for either of those houses. And that leaves Gryffindor. You would do well in Gryffindor as well. I guess that leaves the choice at either Slytherin or Gryffindor. What do you want? I understand that. That's fine, then, we can do that. If you insist, then we will put you with your sister, although keep in mind that you would have done well in Slytherin. No? Fine. **Gryffindor**."

The girls had identical grins. They were still together.

"If you two are done celebrating, we need to hurry over to the Great Hall so that the first years can be sorted. This is Lily, one of the prefects of your year, and also in Gryffindor. She will introduce you to some of the other people in your year, and show you around the school, until you know how to get around."

That said, Professor McGonagall grabbed the sorting hat, and all but ran out of the room, leaving Rachel and Ariana alone with the girl she had introduced as Lily.

Lily grinned at the two of them for a minute, then said, "I'm Lily, but McGonagall told you that already. C'mon, let's go to the dining hall. It's this way." Along the way to the hall, Lily explained how classes worked, and more about the soon to be sorted first years.

As they entered the Great Hall, they realized that they had gotten there just in time, as McGonagall was about to call out the name of the first first year. The three of them ignored the sorting, as Lily whispered to them about the different people in their year.

"Those four boys are nicknamed the marauder's because of all of the trouble that they enjoy stirring up." Lily said in a hushed whisper pointing them out. "The one that's not really doing anything is Peter. Remus is the quiet one that really only listens. Sirius is the one who happens to never shut up. Look, he's talking even now. The one with the disorderly hair is James."

"Does James like anyone?" Ariana quickly put in.

"No. Why?"

"No reason. I just thought that he was kinda cute."

"You and the rest of the school." laughed Lily.

Rachel simply rolled her eyes. Trust her twin to have already gotten a crush on the most sought after boy in the entire school.

The sorting ended very quickly, and then Dumbledore stood up. "A few words. I would like to welcome our two exchange students, both of whom I see have been sorted into Gryffindor."

A loud whisper from the direction of the Slytherin table could be heard, "Of course they would be Gryffindor's. That's where all the goody-two-shoes and mudbloods are."

A large portion of the room gasped, but Dumbledore continued as if nothing had happened. "It would be advisable to stay out of the forbidden forest, as it is questionable that you may make it of there alive. Finally, be cautious as to who you befriend, and what information you give them. You don't know who might be a death-eater. Enjoy your meal."

With that, all of the plates filled up and the entire room proceeded to demolish the meal, the marauder's all but shoveling food into their mouths. The three girls tried their hardest to stifle their giggles, but they failed miserably.

Soon people began to drift out of the Great Hall, and up to the common rooms. Lily lead out the Gryffindor first years, and Rachel and Ariana, leaving James with his precious marauders, still stuffing their faces. She sighed and muttered under her breath, "How did he manage to become a prefect yet again? I have no idea how he manages to pull it off." Then she said a little bit louder, "This way to the Gryffindor common room."

And with that, they were off. The beginning of a Hogwarts year had only just begun.


	3. A Borrowed Cloak for a Borrowed Prank

Rachel, Ariana, and Lily had been sitting in the corner of the common room ever since they had left the Great Hall; something very uncommon for anyone other than the marauders. The bit of information that would've been even more surprising was what they were talking about.  
  
The twins had been, and continued to tell Lily about their other school. They naturally left some things out, but they were currently telling Lily about one of their favorite pranks - more like bits of revenge - that they had played on their worst enemy.  
  
"And then he stood up, and got onto the table that he had been sitting at. That in itself was surprising, but when he started to sing a rather out of tune rendition of 'I'm a Little Teapot,' with all of the gestures, we couldn't hold in our laughter anymore. He was never completely able to re-" Ariana was cut off as Rachel had leaned over to whisper in her ear.  
  
When Rachel sat back down again, Ariana nodded subtly and continued to tell her tale, "He was never able to completely regain his pride."  
  
As Ariana finished her sentence, Lily glanced at her watch, and let out a quiet gasp. "I've got to go now. Prefect meeting. I trust that you two can find your way back up to our room?"  
  
"Yes. We can find our way. Go ahead and leave us. It's fine." Before Rachel had even said the last word, Lily had run off to do whatever it was that was so important.  
  
As soon as they were sure that they were alone they began to talk in hushed whispers.  
  
"So then all we have to do is put that in his food?"  
  
"Yep. That's all there is to it. With the exception of the cloak."  
  
"But will he let us use it?"  
  
"I think that if you ask him nicely and phrase it correctly, he will perfectly willing to loan it to us." Both girls grinned evilly then stood up. They skimmed the room, then noticed the marauder's coming through the portrait-hole.  
  
Rachel marched right up to James, with her sister trailing a couple steps behind, as if unsure about what they were about to do.  
  
"Hi James." Rachel said. "Can I talk to you for a sec?"  
  
"Uh. Sure." He nodded gingerly, then turned to his friends. "Guys, I'll be right back." When the guys nodded, he tugged on Rachel's arm. "If you come with me, I know somewhere we can go where we won't be overheard."  
  
Rachel let him lead her on, until they were in the room. "I have a favor to ask."  
  
"Well?"  
  
"Could we borrow your invisibility cloak?"  
  
James almost fell over backwards. "M-my invisibility cloak?"  
  
Rachel felt like her ribs would crack from suppressed laughter. It was all she could do to simply nod.  
  
"How did you find out about that?"  
  
Without skipping a beat, Rachel took a deep breath, then grinned, "You."  
  
James really did fall over that time. He stared at her wide-eyed. Someone had found out about his invisibility cloak from him. That didn't make any sense, though. He hadn't talked about it once, this entire year. He thought for another minute, then realized that they had mentioned it once on the train in reference to a prank. But if they had heard about the cloak, then that would mean that they also knew about the prank.  
  
"Fine. You may borrow it. Please be careful. C'mon, and I'll show you the way back to Gryffindor Tower."  
  
"Thanks, Prongs."  
  
James started, then continued walking out the door, making sure that Rachel was following, sulking to himself all the while.  
  
~*~  
  
They had traveled the entire way back to the tower in silence, and then James had gone up to his bunk and pulled out the cloak. He had handed it to Rachel, who had been waiting in the common room, then stalked off to be alone.  
  
Rachel, as soon as she had received cloak, had rushed off to meet her sister in the corner of the common room.  
  
Ariana was sitting in the corner of the common room with a small vial next to her, and a giant book on her lap. She didn't even move as her sister sat down next to her, waiting for her to be done with the book.  
  
After about a minute, she shut the book gently, and handed Rachel the vial. Then she snapped her fingers, effectively banishing the book back into the locked case where the twins usually kept it.  
  
The girls got up as one, made sure no one was watching them, then left the tower. Once they were out of sight of the Fat Lady, they pulled on James's invisibility cloak. Traveling as softly as they could, while trying to remember exactly where they were headed, was definitely a lot harder than it looked. However, the girls were well in practice of doing both at the same time, and eventually found their way to the painting blocking entrance to the kitchens.  
  
"Just tickle the pear. That's what the Book said." Ariana whispered this while following her own directions.  
  
"This is all too easy." muttered Rachel under her breath, as they stepped into the kitchen.  
  
The two were about to pull of the borrowed cloak when a sudden snore from the corner of the kitchen made them both take a step back, surprised. They turned to recognize James.  
  
James's head was almost inside a now empty carton of chocolate ice cream. He had obviously come to drown out his hurt pride in the kitchens with the ice cream, and had fallen asleep as soon as he had finished.  
  
Realizing that nothing short of a bullhorn would wake the sleeping figure, the girls pulled off the cloak.  
  
Immediately a house elf ran up to them with a grin that was too large for its face saying happily, "Is there anything Clumsy can do to help you?"  
  
Rachel handed the elf the vial, saying "Could you please be careful to polish all of the silverware with this."  
  
"Of course, misses. Clumsy would be happy to help you by polishing the silverware."  
  
"Thank you, Clumsy."  
  
Clumsy, with the vial held very carefully in its hands made its way to the drawers in the far corner of the kitchen. It set the vial on the counter then promptly fell on its face.  
  
Stifling giggles, the girls turned around and left the room.  
  
They made their way back to the common room with no problems. After quickly changing into their pajamas, they collapsed into their beds.  
  
~*~  
  
The next morning dawned gorgeous, but the twins missed it completely. They had finally woken up after Lily had used a spell to make water spill down on their heads.  
  
The two annoyed girls had changed their clothes rather hurriedly, then sprinted down to breakfast, leaving a very shocked Lily behind.  
  
Lily walked in rather dignified, a couple minutes later just in time for the beginning of the show.  
  
The marauder's were standing on the table, singing 'I'm a Little Teapot' at the top of their lungs, while doing all of the hand motions. They were about as off-key as a person could get. The rest of the Gryffindor's were accompanying, although they were quite a bit closer to the right key.  
  
The Ravenclaw's were also singing as loud as they could, although they were nowhere near as audible as the marauder's. If you listened, you could hear a very nice rendition of 'Twinkle Twinkle Little Star.'  
  
The Hufflepuff's managed to sing an interesting version of 'Row Row Row Your Boat.' It was actually rather pretty, since they were singing in a round.  
  
Lucius Malfoy and Severus Snape were standing on top of the Slytherin table, in positions similar to that which the marauder's were standing in. The only difference was that they were singing 'The Itsy Bitsy Spider.'  
  
Lily looked around the room, then collapsed onto the bench right next to Ariana and Rachel. The threesome almost died of laughter in the short moment.  
  
Dumbledore surveyed the room, and smiled. Pranksters in action always seemed to amuse him. Although, funny as it might be, the noise was definitely starting to get annoying. "Finite Incantem." he muttered, waving his wand.  
  
Snape and Malfoy scurried out of the room as fast as their legs would carry them, their faces bright red with embarrassment.  
  
James and Sirius, on the other hand, were taking as many bows as the could pull off, while Remus and Peter tried to pull them off of the table.  
  
Rachel, Ariana, and Lily, were finally regaining enough breath, and were calm enough to eat their breakfast. There was absolutely no way that this could be pinpointed on them.  
  
Or was there? 


End file.
